I remember being in the hospital and waiting for the results. We pretty much knew it was multiple sclerosis and, I was sobbing.
My family wanted to make me feel better but, they didn’t know what to do and were freaking out. The nurse made everyone leave the room. She sat on the bed next to me and grabbed my hand. I can't remember if she was fixing my IV or doing something but, she was definitely making a statement. She said, “What if it is MS? What are you going to do about it? “ Just the way she said it, something clicked inside of me and, I looked at her and, I stopped crying. At that moment, I knew I had a decision to make. I had to try to think positively.
It took a long time to figure out how to use my spoons (energy). And Medication is not perfect. It kept me from relapsing but, I still felt tired and was in pain. I would go back and forth with my diet,going gluten-free to vegetarian. But I can’t say it was helping. When feeling negative and static, I would think back to the nurse holding my hand in the hospital and, remind myself to think positively.
One night I fell asleep with the TV on. I woke up to an infomercial about a workout and diet program and thought, "Okay, I can try and get through it." It started a process of doing and not doing and figuring out what made me feel better and what made me feel worse. Little by little, it all began to make sense. I realized exactly what I was doing wrong in my nutrition. I learned that MS is not the cause of every pain I may feel. If I’m not doing the right thing with exercise and nutrition, I’m not going to feel good. Once I understood and implemented that knowledge, I just began to feel better and better. I was able to keep being more positive and grow on that positivity. I found a resource that empowered me.
I learned to act on inspiration, on the universe giving me guidance. I surround myself with positivity but also don't beat myself up if I have a bad day. When I’m feeling bad, I take a step back. I remember I can manifest more pain or, I can manifest it away. I say, “ I am here. My body heals every second of every day.” I repeat that over and over and over in my head until it’s gone.